For it is not the same river

Having finished work for the year, I’ve found myself feeling rather sad these past few days. Although I plan to still teach several classes next year, most of my students will go to other teachers, who will have the privilege of seeing them grow as dancers and as people, instead of me.

The truth is that teaching dance has never been about dance for me. Some teachers get into teaching dance because they love dancing, and they see it as a way to continue dancing forever. For me, to get to dance is a bonus. I do consider myself very fortunate that I get paid to be creative and to do what I love, but the reason I teach dance is not because I want to dance everyday. I teach because it really, really matters to me that the children I work with know that they are loved and of worth. I teach because I love them, and I know that having one more person in their lives who loves them can only help. I teach because it’s one thing I know I can do to make the world a better place.

I wasn’t prepared to have to stop teaching so much next year. In fact, the plan was for the exact opposite. I am thankful that I don’t have to give up teaching entirely. I am thankful for an understanding boss, who is allowing me to take the first few months of the year off and come back in the beginning of May. I am looking forward to a new adventure and changing priorities. But, still, I am a bit sad.

From here, things are different. The things that have mattered to me, the time I have been able to take to do those things, that will all change. I am a mum now.

“No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.” 
― Heraclitus 


One thought on “For it is not the same river

  1. Oh my goodness Courtney, this brought tears to my eyes. I hadn’t thought about you not teaching Alana next year, and now I am sad. You are such a wonderful dancer, teacher and mentor, with a calm and careing personality. You have done such a lot of hard work with Alana and put so much extra time and effort in to her with competition work etc. We love and appreciate you so much and await your return with anticipation.
    All the best for a wonderful birthing experience. You will be a fabulous mother and what we miss next year, your very lucky child will gain.
    God bless to you and your family, Merry Christmas xxx

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